There is a strange phenomenon that occurs when two males of this species gain proximity to each other. Whether brothers in a familiar sense or in a bond of kinship the result remains the same. The closer the two are in space to each other, the greater resulting idiocy occurs. Scientists have struggled for years to determine the cause of this occurrence but it has been thwarted by sudden appearances of flip-cup games or ‘Who would win Superman vs. the Incredible Hulk’ discussions. The world may never know.

Happy birthday to my eldest. I love you so much little punkin seed. You are my favorite little girl. I both can’t wait to see you grow up, and never want it to happen.